R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

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R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Paradox on Wed 24 Aug 2011, 7:29 pm

Big Boy had a stroke last night. His gait was very off, he had difficulty standing, and he flinched when we petted him, it seemed like he couldn't see out of his left eye.

For the first time in a very long time Hubby let me down badly. I had to have a epidural done at 8:15. I asked him if he would make arrangements to have Big Boy put down. Since we rescue "seniors" unfortunately we go though this too often. Dear hubby said "No, he would help me in the afternoon". Well, he was off work in the morning, he wasn't in the afternoon. I gave Big Boy one of my Dilaudid so he would sleep.

So when I got back from the epidural (a friend had driven me since I had been twilighted) I called hubby and lo and behold he "can't" get off work. Frankly I don't think he asked.

So even though I'm supposed to be on 24 hour bed rest, alternating ice packs every 20 min. I'm trying to find someone to help me lift a 65 pound dog. (in fact I'm not supposed to be ALONE for 24 hours) My sons best friend, Mark, came through for me and drove out and picked up Big Boy on his own and drove us to the vet. This young man was even sweet enough to ask me if I wanted him to go in with Big Boy. I thank him profusely but told him no matter how hard it was for me Big Boy needed me. Mark came in with me and when the drugs took effect I started crying. That's when I felt Marks arm around my shoulders. It was so nice to have support. We had Big Boy for 10 of his 16 years.

So I'm upset about my dog friend and upset with hubby. Oh, and hubbies reason for not wanting to go? He doesn't like people to see him cry. The vets office is very discreet so no one sees you.

So, I'm going to be off work for another day because I didn't follow directions on my back and it HURTS all for hubbies pride.

But most importantly. R.I.P. Big Boy 1995-2011 The biggest basset with the biggest heart. We're having a imprint of his paw made. The vet said he had such massive paws, was 100 pounds, but only stood 1 1/2' tall. One of a kind.
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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  milo on Wed 24 Aug 2011, 8:21 pm

I'm so very sorry for your loss.


Maybe, just maybe, it was too hard for your husband to do so he backed out the way that he did? I'm saying..."Just maybe????" You describe him as such a wonderful man...so it's hard for me not to think maybe there was something else behind it.

I'm really so sorry about Big Boy. I know you loved him so much. I hope your back forgives you for taking your recovery time to be with Big Boy.

I'm also so touched about the young man who was there for you. It brought tears to my eyes. You are so obviously such a wonderful person to have such thoughtful and supportive people there for you when you need them.

Sending love your way.
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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Paradox on Thu 25 Aug 2011, 3:05 am

Milo, Hubby is supportive of me, that's why I was so taken aback today. I was using a cane to walk last week...how he expected me to get a massive basset who can't walk in the car is beyond me. He is very tender hearted, that's why he is NOT my medical power of attorney. He'd have me barely alive on tubes until the end of time. NOT MY WISHES! But he agreedBig Boy had to go down and said he didn't want him to suffer.
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Sending hugs

Post  KimbaK on Thu 25 Aug 2011, 12:54 pm

I'm so sorry about your dog. I know how much it hurts when you have to make that decision. I'm sorry your hubby let you down on such an awful day. I hope your back feels better soon.

Hugs and kisses,
Kim

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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Sara79 on Thu 25 Aug 2011, 2:59 pm

RIP Big Boy.

I'm sorry about you having to do that by yourself. I had one of my kitties that my hubby had to take in without me. I had to take in our first cat, by myself. Hubby was out of town, and she was going into organ failure and was hurting. We get rescue kitties, so there are times they have unknown health issues. Six months later another of our cats, had symptoms, and his brother weighed twice as much as he did. I broke down sobbing and told hubby I knew what was going to happen and I couldn't do it. Bless his heart, he offered to do all the driving and made all the arrangements, but I still couldn't make myself leave the house with Hubby and the cat. Sure enough, he came home with an empty cat kennel. I was still crying by myself at home.

After that we were blessed with seven years of healthy kitties, until this summer, when we needed to make that visit again. We both went in together. It still wasn't easy, but it was easier together.

I guess what I'm tying to do is defend him some, even though what he did wasn't right by you. I knew how hard it was to do by myself, but I ditched him to have to be alone, simply because of how much I still hurt from the last time. May you and your husband have at least seven years before you both have to make any decisions that again.

Feel free to make him read this, if you think it might help in the future.

Take care!

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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Greeneyes on Fri 26 Aug 2011, 9:47 am

Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss. I love you You!

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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Porsche Fan on Sun 28 Aug 2011, 5:48 pm

Para,

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. It really sucks when you lose a great pet (it sucks).

And, I'm hoping you're feeling a bit better.

For some people, especially for some guys--crying is a big deal. it's all about being strong, showing support, and leading others. I know ladies, sounds like BS, but it all goes back to what guys typically do. and pets, (dogs) are like best friends, or family members. it hurts.

i've seen some really tough people need to head out of "the room" fast because they'll break down--and they don't want people to see that. That, I can understand.

ugh,
mgb
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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Cluelesskitty on Tue 30 Aug 2011, 1:37 pm

Rest in Peace, brave, gentle, sweet, proud Big Boy,

Play happily in the Doggie Heaven where there is no pain, no hunger, no loneliness, no abuse ever,
where a mirror version of all people you loved on Earth and who loved you back play happily with you and pet you,
and love you forever and ever there! sunny flower

Hubby didn't act right, period. There are times when one must swallow one's pride and bear the circumstances, also period Sad

I am so sorry, Charlotte, doubly :[
{{{{ Gentle hugs to you }}}}

Risa

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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Paradox on Wed 31 Aug 2011, 9:25 pm

I love you guys. You give me the support I need and if I'm mad at hubby, you're mad at hubby. Thank you. He fell off his pedestal with my co workers, but he's working his way back up by bringing yogurt parfaits for a surprise snack on a long work day. He knows he did me wrong and is trying to make up for it.

Porsche, thanks for the manly viewpoint.

Oh, my sister in law, who had been a vet tech, saidBig Boy wasn't blind. Flinching like that is a sign of severe pain. I'm so glad I gave him one of my dilaudids before I left. I would hate to think he suffered for four hours while I got the injections. When I got home he was still sound asleep. What bothered me greatly though was that flies had already started congregating. They knew he was failing.

The epidural is finally starting to work. I think it just took extra time for the swelling to go down because I didn't lay flat and do the ice thing. I think the pain has decreased about 60%. I'll take that any day!
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Re: R.I.P. Big Boy the basset

Post  Anna's Mom on Sat 03 Sep 2011, 5:29 am

Sorry, sorry, sorry for all of this Sad

You are an angel to help the animal kingdom like you do.

Big hugs!

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