Husband moved out getting a divorce

Hello friends,

I have been gone for a long time. This past year has been very hard on me. My Mother passed in May last year and my husband was not there for me and made things worse.

He moved out this past Thursday and my headache was horrible! Starting the next day my headache started to get better and so far the headache is still there but much better. I am wondering if with all the stress gone that my headaches improve?

Has anyone else had this happen where a huge stress load has been lifted and your headaches improved? Or is this just a short lived improvement.

I am hoping for a much better year and I know this change will be hard on me.

Thanks for any insight.

kimsmom

I'm so sorry about this stressful time for you. I hope the reduced stress helps and keeps the monster at bay.

I've only just seen your post Pam but am so sorry for what's going on in your life. I had no idea. How are the girls taking it?

How are the headaches, did they come back or have they eased up somewhat still?

{{{{HUGS}}}}

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I hope less stress does make a positive difference in your migraines.

Sending prayers and happy thoughts your way.

K

So sorry to hear this. I worked in medicine for many years and where chronic illness is concerned, marriages suffer horribly.

I don't know if this is the reason he left, but can imagine it contributed to it somewhat. I too hope that with less stress, there will be less migraine and pain for you.!

(((HUGS)))
Trinity

Thank you everyone for your thoughts and help.  No, he did not leave because of my headaches, but he has made many nasty remarks about them over the years. Mostly about the meds I take to help myself.

He claims he left because of my older daughter. He gave me an ultimatum, him or my daughter living here. My daughter is in college and only comes home to visit and it was my holiday with my girls at Thanksgiving. He refused to be here with her and left for two weeks. (this being the first major holiday without my mom). When he came home he said he was considering divorce. My answer was ok. That was all she wrote. No other words were spoken. It should be final any day now.

On my daughters defense, she is a lovely girl who is an honor student and works at Target. She just does not know when to keep her mouth shut when confronted with his nasty remarks. She has no finesse. lol she got that from me but at my age I have learned to control it more. My husband felt she never accepted him because she wanted me back with her father. (this is my second divorce )  He really never tried to help her through this transition when we got married eight years ago. My younger daughter knows when to keep her mouth shut and my husband claims he loves her. In his way he does and I will not take that from him.

I loved the man I married eight years ago, but through the years he changed. He got a smart mouth and turned nasty. He has no forgiveness so if you cross him look out. It is a shame cause I thought I found the right person for us to spend our "golden" years together.

Thank you again for your thoughts. This has not been easy. I am 60 years old and fighting to stay a float money wise until I can draw on social security. Don't ever tell someone their children cannot come home! He lost his battle.

kimsmom

Kimsmom,

I am with you! It is a stupid man who tries to make a woman choose between her children and her husband ( or vice versa).  It sounds like he was adding more stress than support. I know it is very hard to go through it, but you will likely end up better off in the end.  Hang in there!

Ditto. It's been some time Kimsmom, how are you doing? Please drop us a line!

Risa

Thank you so much for checking up on me. I feel I would be doing a whole lot better if I still had my daughter living with me. When she went to college last August, I was alone. Only myself and my new rescue dog. It is so lonely. I like being alone but not living alone.

My youngest will be home for the summer at the end of April. I cannot wait! Happy times again. She is busy "living the dream" so she does not come home on weekends like she did the first semester. My oldest visits as much as her schedule allows. She works and is in her Junior year of college. She lives closer. My ex is not their father.

I am finally ready to date. It has taken me a year to heal. So maybe this summer I will make a few new friends.

I hope all of you are doing well. My migraines and chronic daily headaches have never let up after menopause. I was so hoping for many years that I would get a break. Sadly not.

Much health and happiness to all,
thank you again for your thoughts,

kimsmom

So nice to hear from you, Kimsmom! I am sorry you are experiencing jabs of 'emptinest'.
I dread the time when my own daughter decides to move out, it could be anytime as she is 25 by now, yikes.
our children grown so, fast, SO fast, too fast, ain't they, eh?
But glad to hear you are healed to the point you are ready to date again
Meeting a special person is such an exciting time, if there  is ever an upside to a break-up,
it  is surely  when we are going to meet someone new and are
at our best behaviour, best look and  'are you okay, honey, here honey' - in short, our best everything  
It is exciting to get ready for a date, to dress nice, to look nice, to get to know this new person, to go out,
and of course the sex is interesting again, lol  
It's like  a honeymoon again, sort of.  

Good luck on a dating scene Kimsmom, and have a great time with your visiting kids!

Risa

ps do continue drop in now and then, so we stay in touch, please.