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ramblings, and a new diagnosis code......

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ramblings, and a new diagnosis code...... Empty ramblings, and a new diagnosis code......

Post  Porsche Fan Fri 16 Dec 2011, 11:59 pm

well, you guys know i have a "couple" problems here and there. they are significant, and they tend to get a lot of attention from the doc.....(LOL).

i saw one of my "big roller" docs recently, and my family doc and kind of got set back a bit. i've had a lot thrown at me, and used to stuff, but i got a new code:

it's an ICD9 code, Fatigue and Mailaise. in a nutshell, it means you have various significant diseases that have made you feel very unwell (or like crap) for a chronic, long period 6+ months despite medicalt treatment, exercise, rest, etc. the doc that gave me the dx code i know used to to help along some testing, but it is fair.

but it boils down as a pure recognition is that things regarding health are not good, and will never be good. i have a great mental attitude, and sometimes have some downer days, but always pull myself up. this one took a bit of wind out of my sails.

the other interesting thing that i've noticed, since i have a lot of tests and procedures is some of the comments from staff. mainly from women near my age, or a bit older.

i am often asked if married (my response is i'm waiting for a rich wife with good health insurance). always asked if i have kids. i'm wondering why do i get asked these personal questions. i answer freely with the pure fact that i don't really want to pass this genetic wealth onwards. i think it's a moral and ethical decision. one radiologist tech said i could always adopt. i said "i'm tired--i don't have the energy to take care of kids." so i thought, as i had my CT and the rest period between images of why i get asked this stuff so much by these ladies.... am i getting empathy or pity since i'm up the creek, or is there some maternal instinct that they ask? when i mention my mom passed from this stuff 6 years ago, the look on their faces seems to deepen. these questions have been going on for years.

rather strange, but just an observance. "but you look great for all the problems you have." that's another one--i know all of you are used to this. i also get, wow you're pretty up-beat compared to people that come in here with minor stuff. i always have that feeling after these interludes with docs and medical people that they are quietly thinking--this guy is totally screwed. i talked to a cancer patient, and some of the same sentiment comes out....the difference is i don't have cancer diagnosed. it's like being terminal, but no one's told you you're terminal but in fact, you have one foot on the banana peel and one in the grave.

i have my comments from my cardiologist....stop taking your meds and if we shut down your pacemaker, you're not going to be with us too long. all of my stuff is long term and not curable, just treatable. more problems will come out as i get older.

like i said, i've spent some time with a cancer patient. going with them to treatments, surgery, follow-up visits. staff seem to fall over cancer patients with empathy. most patients that i observed never had a problem in their life (and these are older people). they vocally announce it. i've spent a lot of time with my own stuff at some of the highest end hospitals. this isn't bragging. this is seeing the worst of the worst patients with basically no chance for recovery trying to buy some time. cancer patients, and friends/family of, please don't be offended. my family has been through this, and it's only a matter of time before i get a diagnosis.

having this new diagnosis doesn't mean that your life entirely sucks....just a large portion of it. it's actually just a medical definintion and an acknowledgement. you still can have some energy reserves to have fun. maybe go to a gala, out for some drinks...maybe even venture in dating.

after some deep thoughts, my cholesterol medication was doubled to help with some problems despite my previous problems and risks, and started another med that will cause negative cardiac side effects, but essential to have some energy.

i just thought i'd post this to get some of your thoughts, if you'd lend them. i analyze the heck out of everything all the time, but found this interesting.
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Post  30yrsofheadache Sat 17 Dec 2011, 5:57 am

I think for women this is just a normal question they ask anyone to get conversation rollling. They see an intelligent, attractive, man, and no wedding ring..... Maybe they have a single friend, daughter, etc. Then when you tell them about your medical history, they feel empathy and some disappointment possibly. I think you are too hard on yourself. There are many women who would love to take a chance on a man with such medical problems if he was willing to treat them well (as I am sure you would). I kind of agree with you on the having kids part, for now.

Now, about the diagnosis code. Almost all my friends with Lyme get that kind of diagnosis. Probably most of us here could qualify. I am not making light of it, just trying to put it in perspective. It is tough, I know well, to get through life like that, but you will adjust to it. Also the levels of fatigue will fluctuate with meds, amounts of rest and stress. I think the hardest part is feeling like you have to control your own healthcare so much. That alone is tiring. Ifelt like that until I found my current Dr. and was able to let most Laughing of it go. I understand that you have lots of issues that are really complicated. I hope you give yourself a break from it all every once in a while. sunny
Hugs,
Cindy

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Post  tecky Sat 17 Dec 2011, 7:46 am

Marc,

I agree with Cindy. I think the questions may just be a way for the nurses to try to take your mind off of the "medical stuff" going on and encourage conversation. I'm often asked questions about children, etc., by nurses. I don't think they mean anything other than to put you at ease.

I admire you for your ability to stay upbeat with all that you have going on and all the medical appointments and tests you endure. You have a remarkable spirit, Marc.

Please take care.
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Post  Cluelesskitty Sun 18 Dec 2011, 9:57 pm

always asked if i have kids.

Just pinch these nurses in the butt, Marc, and say "with you, I am ready to have one right away" Smile



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Post  Porsche Fan Sun 18 Dec 2011, 11:15 pm

umm, kitty--that might get me into a little trouble.....LOL Cool

i have not felt "well" for years. this isn't a new feeling to me....i'd say going on 10 years now. i start off with some energy, taper off during morning and really fall off a cliff in the afternoon and actually have the most energy at night--but with a high level of ache, headache, etc.

i think what opened my eyes to it was the diagnosis code--that's all. it's no surprise at all, but when i researched it more, it just confirms that it's more than just feeling crappy--it's feeling crappy all the time. it's not just 1 or 2 problems, it's more on the magnatude of 8-10 diseases that just won't get better. and a couple that are expected to come out over time (ugh, memory).

it's not chronic fatigue syndrome. that's different alltogther. you guys are right, what the heck is the tech supposed to say when they look at the history sheet that's pages long. thanks 30years...for the compliment. the dating game in your 30's is not ripe with women looking to take of sick people that I've found (nor do i want someone to take care of me).

i've been introduced a few times this year and find it incredibly hard even to come to any common-ground to discuss. everything revolves around medical. doctors, labwork, appointments, tests. as i'm typing this, my schedule is being dictated by labwork that must be done tomorrow and a doc's appointment.

oh well, that's why i don't get hung up on this stuff. maybe i need to just wear a wedding ring. from my buddies that are married, that gets more attention than being single. yes i know, that's bad.

like i said, some ramblings.
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Post  Cluelesskitty Tue 20 Dec 2011, 6:45 pm

Porsche Fan wrote:umm, kitty--that might get me into a little trouble.....LOL Cool

.

If the nurse was me Marc, we would start these troubles right away.
As a nurse I'd feel it my duty to take a good care of you, Marc.. ramblings, and a new diagnosis code...... Hugs12

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